John 15:1-8

John 15:1-8 (NIV)

I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. 3 You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you.4 Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up thrown into the fire and burned. 7 If you remain in in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. 8 This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

this passage was a focus for the counselors out at camp shetek this summer. it was just what i needed to get focused to reach campers and in order for me to see clearly what the Lord wants me to work on in my life. when i was meditating on this passage all my focus fell on defining what the "fruit" is in these verses. "fruit" can mean different things to everyone, but my first thought was the fruit of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. i have known the fruits of the spirit since i was in sunday school, but i never really took the time to apply them to my life. do i show love and kindess to everyone (loving the unlovable)?...am i joyful in everything i do?...do i show goodness to people, or have patience with them, or with God?...am i self-controled? i never asked these questions before. but now that i have, i am ashamed at how often i am impatient, unkind, unloving, unjoyfu, etc...when i think of my future spouse someday, i want him to possess all these attributes! but how can i expect God to bless me with someone like that when I myself lack in all these areas? 

this self evaluation made me think to camp shetek's theme verse last year (Psalm 139:23-24). this verse is often recited in my head to remind me that i need to led God mold and shape me into the women He wants me to be.

Psalm 139:23-24

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.